I spent most of the day yesterday in the ER. I found out a few weeks ago that I was pregnant. Then yesterday I started cramping and bleeding.... After several hours in the ER we were told that I lost the baby. The hardest part has been the aftermath. I woke up last night and I felt the emptiness... This is a feeling I am struggling to deal with... It is the most painful feeling I have ever felt... I don't know what to do with myself. I wasn't that far along, for some reason my doctor never did an ultrasound (that was supposed to be next week) or did they give me an estimated due date or anything... I'm just left here with the emptiness and sadness.
When I got home yesterday after the whole ordeal, I was on instagram... not sure why, I guess I was trying to look and think of something else. But someone had posted a verse, I opened my Bible app to check it out and continued reading on. Then I found this (a couple of verses later): "Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death, and burst their bonds apart. Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of man!" Psalm 107:13-15. I keep trying to remember through my pain that He is in control... and I can bring my pain and sorrow to Him. I can call out and he hears. I pray that God helps as we heal and start this process over....
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